In a previous life (gurus live multiple life times) I
was responsible for the maintenance of a network.
Since I was the only technical guy in that small
company, it came to pass that all mechanical failures
were brought to my attention. Copiers, fax machines,
printers, desktops, routers, phone PBX and voicemail
programming...you name it, I "fixed" it.
This was fine, it kept me busy...I began to notice a
disturbing trend. As my time became shorter and my
days more busy, those devices that I left in pieces
for extended lengths of time worked immediatly after I
put them back together again. Having performed no
maintenance, just taking it apart, leaving it that way
for several days and then putting it back together
again, somehow fixed the machine.
This trend became more and more noticable as my fellow
co-workers began to notice this strange gift that I
possessed of fixing things without even having to
touch them. Seems the devices that were failing knew
me by reputation and made all attempts to avoid being
disassembled. It got to the point where a co-worker
had to just call me on the phone and hold the receiver
to the errant device and I would tell the device to
function, and lo-and-behold, it would. This talent
developed to the extent where my interaction with an
errant device was minimalized to a cursory evil glance
or a stern warning to the offending device. I later
developed this skill to aid in my other
troubleshooting skills. This led to Web and IIS server
maintenance. I grew the skill to the point where an
errant script would miraculously begin functioning
with minimal changes in the script's behaviour. These
skills were honed to the point where my abilities are
highly regarded by those who know them and have seen
them first hand. Granted, there are those devices who
fail to realize what they're up against and rebel
against my will. These devices are made examples of
and paraded amoungst other devices as a warning to
those would attempt to oppose my will. I ran a
disassembled Mac SE30 for two weeks. It was laid out
on a table in the lab like a disected biology lab
animal. Each item peeled back to expose the tender
delicate components. Then as a harsh justice, a
multi-meter probe was unceremoniously shoved into it's
nether regions for no other purpose than to excert my
dominance over the machine. Several days of this
humiliation was enough for the copier to start
functioning again, and our high speed router to
automatically configure it's self for more efficient
packet transfers. Needless to say, once that SE30 was
reassembled, it ran flawlessly and is still serving as
a fax server to this day...
guru n. An expert. Implies not only wizard
skill but also a history of being a knowledge resource
for others. Less often, used (with a qualifier) for
other experts on other systems.
a person with knowledge or expertise : expert
A person from whom (or a place from which) useful
information may be obtained. If you need to know about
a program, a guru might be the source of all good
bits.
My knowledge of historical PDAs and other gadgetry is
also quite well known in this group.
So, I think I can use the title with little
reservation.
Ed
web/gadget guru
--- SlashDevNull <SlashDevNull_at_mac.com> wrote:
>
> > Ed
> > web/gadget guru
>
> Salutations,
>
> Ed always signs his emails with the above.
>
> How do we know he is a 'web/gadget guru'?
>
> Did he have to go to school and pass a course?
>
> And since there is a slash, he is saying that he is
> a 'web guru' AND a
> 'gadget guru'.
>
> Does this mean that he had to pass a series or
> courses?
>
> Or is he just saying this to try an impress us?
> With no certifications to
> back up his claims.
>
> Does anyone else think that we should require some
> proof for guru status?
>
> And what would that proof be?
>
> I propose that we, the newtontalk list, force Ed to
> either prove his 'guru'
> status (if he can!!!) OR remove the 'guru' proclaim!
>
> If we don't take a stand now, people will start
> proclaiming they are
> 'shamen', 'wizards', or 'governors'. When will this
> end?
>
> I also propose that we set up a battery of tests and
> a rating system from
> 'idiot',at the low end, to 'Full wiz-bang
> Newtonite', at the top end.
>
> As people pass these tests, they would be allowed to
> raise their rating and
> everyone would have proof of this rating.
>
> No more 'self-proclaiming' titles!
>
> Rise up with me people and help me bring some type
> of order to this
> multi-tiered system!
>
> David
>
> P.S. And I think I should automatically get 1 step
> above idiot, say
> 'bumbler' for thinking of the system. Everyone else
> starts as idiot.
=====
note: This does not constitute a sig file...
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